Dear Harlan: I’m having problems with my roommate. It started with him butting into my conversations. I’ve made a list of all the things that bother me about him:
(1) He has no common sense. (2) He doesn’t respect my personal space. (3) He forces his way into my business. (4) He goes through my stuff without getting permission. (5) He has parties in his room late at night. (6) He takes stuff that doesn’t belong to him. (7) He chews gum loudly. (8) He complains about my stuff. (9) He will not allow me to have an alarm clock. (10) He has no manners or respect for my boundaries. (11) He comes into my room and wakes me up. (12) He thinks he can tell me what I can do. How should I handle this? — Bad Roommate
Dear Bad Roommate: Here’s my list for you: (1) Stop making lists about the things you hate. (2) Make a new list. (3) List 10 positive things about your roommate. (4) Throw away the hateful list. (5) Start over with your roommate. (6) Tell him you just want to get along with him. (7) Ask him if he wants to get along with you. (8) Figure out the bare minimum of what it will take to get along. (9) Stay out of the room as much as possible. (10) Make more friends outside your room. (11) Find a new roommate for next semester. (12) If this is too hard, involve your resident adviser to see how he or she can help you live in peace.