Dear Harlan: My girlfriend of six weeks and I just split up over what I guess was my dishonesty. We met on a dating site, and when we got intimate we agreed to not visit the site. She seemed jealous and insecure over that. Well, I didn’t go on that site, but had been a member of another free site. A lady winked at me on the site and I was curious to see pictures of her with no intent to pursue. Well, it turned out it was my girlfriend setting me up to see if I was dishonest. I treat computers as objects, not human beings. Help me, Harlan.
Mixed Up in Maine
Dear Mixed Up: Ding. Ding. Ding. Yes, you got busted hanging out on a dating site while dating another woman. That’s why you got dumped. You can’t do that, man. But don’t be too sad. Thank this girl for setting you up sooner rather than later. This jealous woman saved you a lot of aggravation and drama in the future. See, I actually believe that you didn’t have intent to pursue, but you did have the intent to peruse – and that was too much for this wounded woman. She came into this relationship as damaged goods. Be grateful it happened sooner rather than later. She was looking for a reason to be suspicious and found it. If it didn’t happen with a wink online, it would have been a text message, a suspect Facebook post, or that wandering eye of yours (which I’m sure is a medical condition). If you had no intention to pursue another woman, apologize for violating her trust and explain that you were just curious about the winker, but you’re only interested in winking back at her. Then wink (or not).